relationships

why are relationships so difficult?

All feelings are welcome here

contact me at:
relationships3@aol.com

http://twitter.com/relationships3
Custom Search

Latest Commented Entries

Mistakes Men Make (81)

Fri, 11/13/09 10:26 A GMT-05

Character is king! (40)

Wed, 11/25/09 10:17 A GMT-05

Our Sponsors

More

Blog Status

  • 5 yrs 21 wks 2 days old
  • Updated: 26 Nov 2009
  • 8,439 entries
  • 34,291 comments

Quick Poll

Are women really attracted bad boy/jerks more than than they are to caring responsible guys?
Yes
No
Not Sure

Linkblogs

relationship talk

Fri, 02/23/07 12:13 A GMT-05

Newsfeeds

Sun, 09/10/06 12:07 P GMT-05

Leo Buscaglia Quotes

Sun, 08/27/06 11:32 A GMT-05

About Psychology

Sat, 07/08/06 11:48 P GMT-05
Tags:  

Fault tolerance

Sat, 06/03/06 1:25 P GMT-05
Tags:    

Social Psychology Network

Sun, 05/28/06 5:15 P GMT-05

Go Ask Alice

Fri, 04/14/06 9:09 P GMT-05
Tags:  

Picturing Women

Thu, 03/30/06 2:55 P GMT-05
Tags:  

The Attitude Doctor

Wed, 03/29/06 7:01 P GMT-05

From Sophia's Blog verewig

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Call it the eternal embrace.

http://verewig.blog-city.com/

Encyclopedia of Philosophy

Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Midlife Crisis

Midlife Crisis Thoughts

Mailing List

Search Box

 

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
RelationshipTalk.net
Mars, Venues and in-between

What Women Want

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

How does he make her feel so sexy?

Women's thoughts concerning size

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

The Size of it

Why do Women Crave Bad Guys?

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting Bad Boys

RSS Add-Me








Her attraction for me is gone (79)

posted Wed, 11/04/09
'vintbikescribe'
My ex wife told me her feelings of guilt will haunt her for the rest of her life, and this was after I forgave her. Know that I did so not only for her benefit, but for my mental health and the well being of our children. With her, there was no chance to reconcile; her attraction for me was gone, even though she 'hated herself' for feeling that way.

What is confusing is her bitterness towards me now that I'm in another relationship. So, hard as I try (including reading everything I can find on the subject) I'm no closer to understanding her and cheating than I was when she first told me. Bottom line? It's a lose-lose.

More than anything, it seems the basic problems that lead to cheating are often if not always present after the deal. In my case, her words were strongly directed to inform me that I wasn't 'being replaced' but her actions said just the opposite. For two or three years before she often withheld sex, but it wasn't until she actually hooked up with another man that she seemed to find the courage to tell me she wasn't in love with me anymore and wanted to be on her own. 'Time to think' was the line as I recall, but it was actually time to do something else. And that 'something' wasn't done alone.

Most painful was her return when my father passed away. The divorce was not final yet and she expressed deep regret and caring towards me during that period; saying she wanted to come home and take care of me. I was not ready to have her move back in (and my kids were totally confused by this time...especially my 16-YO daughter) but we did spend time together, dating and kissing/holding each other. A few weeks down the road I sensed her pulling away again, and when I called her on it she confessed she had been seeing a man (the third since our split, this one married with kids...) and she she 'didn't want to be that way' (cheating) anymore.

To review, my wife did not want to cheat on her married boyfriend by seeing me; her husband. Convoluted? Call it what you want but she's been in the rear-view ever since. Is it manipulation or meanness? You tell me.

Look, it didn't take me long to discover my ex would say things she thought i *wanted* to hear, so I'm down.

Still, there's a history of guilt and sorrow in her family...almost like some are addicted to it. Take a good life, mess it up and have something to bitch, moan and complain about for years. Plus, she's ignoring her kids. Any idea what to make of that? I mean, out of the picture for over a year.

links: digg this    del.icio.us    technorati    reddit

AddThis Social Bookmark Button



The purpose of this site is to allow you to express how you feel. It’s not to determine whom is right or wrong.


1. Dave left...
Wed, 11/04/09 10:36 am

Can anyone explain this?


2. The Good Guy left...
Wed, 11/04/09 10:55 am

"Can anyone explain this?"

Yes. American women, GENERALLY, only respect/desire men who treat them like crap, screw other women behind their backs, and live off their money.


3. Ali left...
Wed, 11/04/09 12:22 pm

Holy Shyt.......that's cold.


4. Dave left...
Wed, 11/04/09 3:41 pm

Michelle Langley says: Women's relationships today follow a very predictable pattern: They push men for commitment They get what they want They lose interest in sex They become attracted to someone else They start cheating They become angry and resentful They begin telling their partners that they need time apart They blame their partners for their behavior...and eventually, after making themselves and everyone around them miserable for an indefinite, but usually, long period of time, they end their relationships or marriages.


5. Leon left...
Wed, 11/04/09 11:06 pm

I cheated on my wife several times throughout our short marriage. We were together for four years before getting married and I thought she was what I wanted. I guess I felt guilty,but it didn't stop me. I think it really messed her up for awhile, and for that I am sorry. She's off with a new man now and I am free to do my thing.


6. Ali left...
Thu, 11/05/09 9:35 am

Leon why didn't you just leave? Why did you do that to your wife?